Tag Archives: live better

So long, 2013. It’s been swell.

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photo-5I’ve often heard, and I suppose I believed that the first Christmas (or other major holiday you may celebrate) without someone you  love is the hardest, but now I’m not sure that’s true.

Last Christmas, it had been 6 months since Joey’s death, and I missed him so much, but I feel like I was still just in shock so much that I couldn’t quite come to terms with the reality. I had started walking and set my goal to run a 5k in 2013, and these goals were so important for me to keep moving and taking breaths every day, but in some ways they were also a much needed distraction at the time.

This Christmas, however, I have felt the absence of Joey much worse. The permanence of death has set in, and the least of things has moved me to tears. Read the rest of this entry

Feeling

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745_WomanPrayingI’m not sure I can even begin to wrap words around the emotions I am feeling today.

Yesterday was the day my mom and Joey’s friends finally had the opportunity to face George Martinez, Jr., the man responsible for the death of Joey Jello. Read the rest of this entry

Journey

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4215669914_59f859dd60_zFinally got back out there for a run today. I wasn’t feeling 100%, and honestly, when I woke up this morning, I REALLY didn’t want to go run, but the thought of another day off just didn’t sit well with me. So, I laced up my shoes and went for it.

I love that phrase about lacing up my shoes, but to be really real I have to admit that getting out for a run actually takes me a TON more work. I have to get 3 boys dressed, pack the twins’ bag with extra clothes just in case they have an accident, make and pack lunch for the boys to eat when we leave the Y, pack my water and a post-run snack, lace up my shoes and velcro three more pairs, strap all of us into the van, drive to the Y, get everyone out of their car-seats, drop boys in their respective classrooms, drop my bag in the locker room, and THEN…go for a run.

But anyhoo, once I got out there, I just took it one stride at a time, and I ended up doing 5k in just under 40 minutes! This is close to my best time for the distance, so after a week off everything and not having run a full 5k in weeks, I feel pretty happy with my performance.

The progress I really want to acknowledge today, though, actually has to do with who I have become. In my past, I have gone on diet & exercise programs repeatedly, and each time I eventually went “off plan” as they say. I’d feel excruciatingly guilty as well as completely out of control. But last week when I was sick and ate some foods that weren’t the healthiest (including way too much Halloween candy), I didn’t let it get to me. I just thought, “I know I’m going to get back to running next week, and hey, this is just food, after all.” It’s taken a lot of work, but I think I’m finally starting to make progress in the area of  no longer allowing FOOD to have the power in our relationship. I don’t just think of it as fuel; I do really enjoy tasty foods all the time, BUT it’s not my life anymore. It has no hold over me. I don’t think in terms of “good foods” and “bad foods,” just foods that make me feel good, foods that I can enjoy and also count on having energy for my run later.

The other thing I discovered this week when I was feeling a bit bloated and yucky was that life really is all about the journey. I know it’s a cliche, but truthfully, the destination of a healthy body isn’t a place I’m going to get to and just stop moving. I’m going to be a runner for as long as my body will keep moving. So it’s no big deal if one day I don’t feel super fantastic. It’s just one day. It’s just one speck of my life. As long as I keep moving forward, the good days will outweigh the bad days, and when I look back at them all, I believe I’ll see a life well-lived.

Goal crushing!

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171428_153587931362464_100001337742137_279890_7277629_o-copy1Yesterday, I did something I’ve never done before: I ran my first 5k without any walking! Another goal crushed!

I have been choosing the 5k workout on the treadmill and just walking the first 5 minutes to warm-up for a while now, so on Tuesday, I ran the rest of the workout for a total of 38 consecutive minutes of running. Having gotten that close, I knew I was going to have to attempt the full 5k yesterday, so I restarted the workout after my 5 minute warm-up.It was just as I found my running gait that the stream of sunlight was redirected through the windows directly into my face, where it stayed for the first 2 miles of my run. Read the rest of this entry